A Give and Take.

Marriage isn't easy.  I know that even before I say my "I Do's" but it isn't something to be scared of either.  I think in our day and time marriage is almost looked down upon and it's for sure a minority.  But I want to change that statisic, even if it is only for MY marriage.

I recently got asked by one of my customers if I was "ready" for the change.  Being that it came from an older MALE, it caught me off guard.  More times than not, it's a woman who inquires about personal things such as weddings or relationships.  I knew he had more to tell than just to ask me if I was ready so I answered him, "Yes. I am."  He then told me something that has stood out in my mind.  "It is what you make it. It's always a give and take."

Without going into too much detail, he and his wife haven't always seen eye to eye on life's challenges.  But in the recent years I think they have resolved a lot of the past and put it in their past.  I know a lot of prayers have been issued for the couple, and overcoming a hard marriage is a work for God, I believe.

This man told me to be sure and go into the marriage with no expectations that my husband can do every thing that I "expect."  Men are internally different than women and don't think to just do things around the house.  This whole conversation with this man was in my mind last night as Brian and I discussed home duties.  Brian confirmed just what the man was saying to me, don't expect.  Ask and let your partner help you, don't nag and frustrate your partner.

There will be many battles in Brian and I's life, I'm no stranger to that.  I've seen marraiges go through hardships over something that started small and built over time.  I don't want that to be Brian and I and I refuse to let the Devil win that one and come between us.  I try to always tell Brian my most honest thoughts, even when you doesn't want to hear them or doesn't agree with me.  It truly is okay to agree to disagree sometimes.  Brian and I have already figured that one out, and it works for us.

As those battles arise, we have to know which ones to pick and which ones to ask God to give us forgiveness to just let go, even if we strongly feel we are right.  In the end, God doesn't care who was "right" in arguments, He cares how you treated each other and looked to His word for strength.  I've already read a few marriage geared books, and downloaded several new devotionals to my Bible app to keep me in the right direction. 

My wedding day will be the happiest day of my life.  I want it to be perfect, like any other bride.  But my marriage outweighs my wedding.  I want my husband and I to have a strong, healthy, honest, dependable marriage that never lets the outside world creep in and try and destroy us.  Brian is my dream come true, and I will always be grateful to God for allowing this wonderful man to walk into my life.  I want Brian to know each and every day that he is loved beyond measure and has a wife that will stand beside him in good times AND bad.  Our lives will not always go as planned, but that's when you perk up and develop a new plan.

That's just where my heart is today..