I never knew you..

But I love you just the same..

Today would have been my oldest brother's birthday.  But I don't get to go see him tonight, take him a gift, or give him a hug.  My brother is in Heaven where God gets to give those hugs. 

I don't think I've ever talked about Daryl on the blog.  But that's what this thing is for, right? To be open and honest and comfortable doing so.  Some of you who read I know, some I don't.. but regardless, I'm okay talking about it now.

If we are friends on Facebook, then you saw on March 17th that my whole family mourned the loss of my dear brother.  Daryl was just a few weeks shy of turning 12 years old when he was taken from this life.  He and my other two older brothers, as well as some cousins, were all outside riding bikes and playing like boys do.  A car (a man that worked for my father) hit my oldest brother and killed him.  Basically it crushed his fragile body. 

I can't begin to fathom what it was like around my family during this time.  You see, I wasn't even born yet.  This was a year prior to me coming along.  I've been told numerous times that I was the good that came from the bad for the family.  A new face, a new little body to love on and cherish.   Never a replacement, but sometimes a strong reminder of him. 

I wish I had the pictures to prove this to you, but if you compare our school pictures per grade with each other it is a remarkable similarity we share.  Facial features, hair, etc.   God knew exactly what He was doing when he formed me and perfected me that way.  I was his answered prayer to my family. 

I cannot ever remember a time when Daryl wasn't talked about.  I never got to physically meet him, but I've known him my whole life and spent a good many hours talking to him in Heaven.  I know he is my angel and he watches over every step I make.  That's what big brothers do, they protect.  And I know he is protecting me.

It has always been common to talk about Daryl with my nephews and niece, even at a young age.  Jenna is only 18 months old and she has been pointing at Daryl's pictures on the wall for several months and calling him by name.   We think it is important to let them know who their uncle would have been.  And since I never knew him either, I KNOW just how important it is to hear stories about him. 

So, Happy Birthday Daryl.  You would have no doubt been a great big brother & best friend.   I love and miss you!  And cannot wait to meet you in Heaven one day!

Those we love don't go away,
They walk beside us every day,
Unseen, unheard, but always near,
Still loved, still missed and very dear.