I'm sitting here at work (shhh!) thinking about what today's topic should be. I've been such a major slacker in the writing a "real" blog post, so I'm trying to think up something good.
After this weekend, I will have Alicia's shower to tell about. I'm so very excited about getting to see all my girls AT THE SAME TIME. This never happens anymore! So, thanks Alicia for getting preggo! :)
I think I just answered my own question on what to write about- friends.
We all have them, and we have all lost them. But there are certain people who walk into your life and never, ever walk out. Those are the true friends that God intended for you. I am not even going to attempt to sit here and name off these people. Chances are, they are all reading this blog right now and know I'm talking about them. Yeah, girl.. I'm talking about you! :)
Let me rewind a little bit, growing up I was the little sister of two big brothers. Normally that means you get to be the punching bag, the one that gets suckered into trying stuff that Mom, of course, said "No" to, etc. But that wasn't my case entirely. Sure, my brothers made me do some stupid things (and THEY got in trouble for it, ha! Karma....) But my brothers cherished me. According to everyone's stories, I was quite their entertainment.
My neighborhood wasn't booming with kids my age, so finding "friends" that way wasn't really an option for me. And to top it off, I was shy. Yes, I was shy. So growing up (before school) I can only really remember having a handful of friends. Misty was probably one of my first real friends. I remember sitting at this little pink plastic table that my mom had put out in the yard for us one summer. We had plenty of "tea parties" around that thing. If you don't remember, then awhile back I made a very sad post about Misty. Since our childhood, she had gotten with a different group than I did and we had since split ways. She ended her life and I was honestly rocked more to the core than I thought I would be. I think back on those days at my pink table and I can smile. I think back on those days when she ended her life and I am sad.
Sure, we had drifted apart and there is no way that what happened is my fault. But somewhere along the way I start to question myself on was there something I could have changed that might have changed her. I know I can't be that way. But it is still a pretty common thought these days. At Misty's visitation, I felt a part of me change. A part of me vowed that night to never ever let someone I considered a part of my life, get that far away from me again. I've never made REAL friends easy, in fact I've had the same group of real friends my entire life almost. And I would absolutely lose a part of my soul if I lost another one of them in such a tragic way.
Friendship is about the good AND the bad times. I've had people come and go out of my life during the last 10 years that I considered a "good" friend and found out later they were nothing what I imagined. I've been stabbed in the back by some, and completely lost touch with others. Real friends don't lose touch. I'm fortunate enough that even though my friends all moved away from me- we never lost touch. True friendship.
I remember my mom telling me the day that I graduated from high school to be sure and speak and say what you wanted to anyone you could that day because it would be the last day you see those people, even your friends. I remember spouting off (as a know-it-all 17 year old would) that there was NO way I was going to lose touch with my friends the way she had (harsh, I know). These were the people that made my life good and I was determined it would be different.
Next year will be my 10 year high school reunion, and while some I have not seen since... my true friends and I still talk weekly, and a lot of times, daily. I proved my mom wrong. And I don't plan on this stopping. Sure, they are all married (almost Mert!) and there are kiddos now, but we all know where we all started and that is WITH EACH OTHER. That's what holds us together.
My friends are me. They made me who I am and helped shaped who I've become. I was fortunate enough to spend my school days with some of the most fabulous women I've ever met. And my college days were nothing short of the same.
We had met at NE, but all found ourselves at Ole Miss too. Alicia was my roommate for real, but I feel like I had quite a few roommates. And I loved it. It was nice to be with another group of girls who understood and cherished me the way that my high school friends always had done.
I left Ole Miss with one of the best things life can give you- I had just mulitplied my "friend" list! Over the next few years, both "sets" of friends were going to be cruicial to my life. I went through some hard times, some hard breakups, and some other things that only my true friends know about. I had support around me 24/7 and I will never ever be able to thank these girls enough. From near AND far, I was prayed for.
So, high school and college had provided me with some wonderful women in my life. The reality of being a woman was now my challenge. Now too I have acquired some beauiful people in my life. Some come from strange situations (like say my ex's mom) but that doesn't change a thing. One comes from work. She knows who she is.. and is probably getting emails in between my typing in this post.
And back to my brothers- I'm one lucky girl. My brothers are my friends. They are there when I need them, and one in particular has been my eyes from the other side of the fence. He is always my #1 go to for advice on a relationship from a guy's point of view.
I grew up with my best friends from the beginning of my life, and along the way I have gathered more. I love each and every one of you and hope you all know what you mean to my life.
Friends may come and go, but I've been blessed that so many of you stuck around!